Well, I have really been thinking hard about my goals for 2020. As most of you know, I’ve taken a step back from photography so figuring out what I want my business to look like for 2020 has been hard. I know I still want to photograph weddings because I love working with couples too much to give it up all together! But having 2 girls under 3 and my husband working a full-time job and being in a new state is a lot to undertake.
So, that being said, my goals for this year are a little more broad and much more focused on my personal growth. I’ve been pondering what my word for the year should be and I have had many words and phrases run through my mind. And normally, I’ve figured it out by now, but this year I really wanted my word to mean something. So, it’s taken me a little longer to pick just one word to focus on. And just the other day, I was reading an article and right when I read this word, I was immediately moved . . . I knew that that was the word I needed to focus on . . . and the word that encompassed allllll the other words and phrases I had be thinking of.
. . . HOPE . . .
2019 was HARD. I’ve struggled with anxiety, depression, feeling lost and not remembering who I am or what my purpose is. And even just typing out those words, is hard for me. But, I have had SO many aha moments in the past 6 months about life, about love, about relationships, about God, about religion, about family and about being authentic with myself and others that it feels so good to finally acknowledge what I’ve really been going through.
And I don’t write this to get sympathy. . . I just hope that maybe someone else needs to know that they’re not alone. That others struggle too and that no one is perfect. And that’s okay. . . So, this year, my focus will be on HOPE. Finding hope in the little things, in my struggles and my triumphs. Finding hope in gaining knowledge, in learning that I’m not alone and never will be. Finding hope in my future, in my girls growing up and in my relationship with my husband evolving. Finding hope in this really really hard world we live in. Finding hope in my business even though it’s not exactly where I want it to be, but finding hope in knowing what it will eventually become. Finding hope in waiting, and in knowing that everything will work out how it’s supposed to. And more than anything, finding hope through my Savior. The one who sacrificed everything for me . . . so that I can fulfill my potential and remember who I am. So that I can be and become who I am meant to be.